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Gilbert & Sullivan Mini-Operettas (Nicely laid out in the book) |
Constructed by Karen Cantor
Download the mp3 and Sing Along with "Cantor and Sullivan"! Download the mp3 and Sing Along with "Cantor and Sullivan"!
The "Why" Question (Tune of "If You Give Me Your Attention" from Princess Ida)
They will give me their attention they will turn to me and gape.They'll put down their Manishevitz, I'll put down my Welch's grape.
Because I am the youngest thus to me it must befall
The Ma Nishtana to read aloud tonight before them all.
I'm not too good at Hebrew yet somehow I must begin
On this night to differentiate a Gimmel from a Shin.
There's no doubt tonight is different from all other nights I've known;
On all other nights a kid can hope that he be left alone.
But I must ask "Why"!
Curiosity's a virtue; everybody tells me that,
Yet tonight I rather fear that I will end up like the cat.
I'm hoping just as I begin to ask my questions four
That the absentee Elijah will come knocking at the door!
Oh I know there is no prophet in my hopes, but God forbid
My nogoodnik Uncle Mordechai should only have a kid!
Then that kid would be the youngest and at long last I would get
To watch someone else have tsouris while I eat my charoset!
But I must ask ?Why?!
[chorus: He must ask "why"! He must ask "why"!]
The "Matzoh" Question (Tune of "Spurn Not the Nobly Born" from Iolanthe)
Most bread is doughy.Yet you must be realizing
This evening, though, we
Dine on bread that's
Done no rising
To-night we must forego
All but unleavened dough
O-therwise we'll be in for
Some chastising
Flat bread! Flat bread!
While other nights we feast
On bread that's filled with yeast,
Tonight we munch instead
Flat bread! O flat bread!
Matzoh is clearly
What we'll serve to our relations
We love it dearly
And we have for generations
Don't bother with a knife
To carve this staff of life
It never breaks
Along the perforations!
Flat bread! Flat bread!
While other nights we feast
On bread that's filled with yeast,
Tonight we munch instead
Flat bread! O flat bread!
[spoken]: Oh Challah! Challah! Challah!
[Bunthorne, Patience, Act I]
The "Bitter Herbs" Question (Tune of "My Eyes are Fully Opened" from Ruddigore)
The herbs we eatOn other nights
Are many and are varied
The same meal may be cilantroed
That has also been rosemaried
And nobody bats an eye
Or makes a fuss
Or cries "Eureka!"
If they find a dash of marjoram
Mixed in with the paprika
We add herbs both sweet and spicy
To a dish that once was blander
What's the harm in mixing cardamom
In with the coriander?
But tonight the thyme is cumin
When we toss into the litter
All those sweet and spicy herbs
Because tonight the herbs are bitter
Yes! Tonight the herbs are bitter
Yes! Tonight the herbs are bitter
If Aunt Sophie reaches for the dill
You would do well to hit her
As you "sagely" tell your Auntie
That tonight the herbs are bitter
Bitter!
Bitter!
Bitter!
Bitter!
Bitter!
Bitter!
Bitter!
Bitter!
The "Dipping" Question (Tune of "I Cannot Tell What this Love May Be" from Patience)
I cannot tell why these double dips.We don't even have potato chips.
And dipping two times, or even one
Is not my idea of fun.
It cannot be elegant or nice
To venture to wet one's parsley twice.
I've done it, and now I do believe
I've gotten salt water on my sleeve!
This deuced dipping may make me scream
For nachos and onions and sour cream.
I do not hold parsley in high esteem!
On all other nights no dipping we do,
But this night we dip not just one time, but two!
On all other nights no dipping we do!
Think of the difference 'twixt zero and tsvay!
Think of the difference 'twixt zero and tsvay:
Dip-a-dip-a-dip
a-dip-a-dip-a-dip-a-dip-a-dip
a-dip-a-dip-a-dip-a-dip-a-dip
Two times!
Oy vey!
The "Leaning" Question (Tune of "When I Was a Lad" from HMS Pinafore)
On all other nightsI sit up straight
With my feet perpendic'lar
To my dinner plate
But on this night I do recline
Which is hardily
An advantageous way to dine
[chorus: Which is hardily
an advantageous way to dine]
For leaning thus
my spoon may fall
and my lap be desecrated by a matzoh ball
[chorus: For leaning thus his spoon may fall
and his lap be desecrated by a matzoh ball]
The "Special Ceremony" Question (Tune of "Here's a How-De-Do" from The Mikado)
Why the big to-do?Why such ballyhoo,
ceremony, fuss, and bother
when all other nights are rather typical?
So, nu?
Why the big to-do?
Why the big to-do?
Why the roasted egg?
Why the lambie's leg?
Why do we do all this cleaning?
Why do all this chametz screening?
Dumping out the keg?!!!
Why the roasted egg?
Why the roasted egg?
When Velveeta on a Triscuit is our ev-e-ry day dish
Why tonight do we eat brisket
And consume gefilte fish?
Tonight we're dressing up!
So fill Elijah's cup!
Hide the afikoman, too!
Set a place for Uncle Lew!
It's a very, very big
A very big to-do!
[spoken] Why the very big to doooooooooooo??
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